The ChatGPT Creative Writing coach at work

[Uncle Gizmo]

The "Holographic Cheat" a scene from my book. It's about 500 words drafted by me talking to my mobile which transcribed my voice into text. NO corrections, pasted it into chatGPT and invoked the creative writing coach.

ChatGPT graded it 3/5. I asked chatGPT to correct spelling and punctuation errors, chat-GPT graded it again at 4/5. Chat GPT suggested further improvement.

I asked ChatGPT about "Dialogue Tags and Descriptions:" And for an example which it provided - See "Enhanced with Dialogue Tags and Physical Descriptions"

Holographic Cheat - Unedited 1st Draft - Start
Liz sat at the roulette table discreetly watching the guy win again. He was Calling black or red with Unairing accuracy. An impossibility to be so accurate, well, unless you had Liz's superpower, she knew that guy was cheating, but she didn't know how She knew of every device, every Contract.

A punter's got up to, and Here. And she had rolled them. All out.

Was he a pre-cogue? Like her. She was sure he wasn't. She could sense another precog. There was nothing from him. She concentrated. He bet on red, she could see it. She could see it would be black 17. The Cubry, I said, Final bets and spun the wheel. She watched.

And the ball settled in black 17. As she had predicted, but then it was in a new. Place, red pocket, red 16. Well, she thought that's not right. Them. I know. It was black 17. She watched carefully. He bet on red again and she knew he was right. The ball. Landed in red, 20. He was. Again. And legitimately he bet on red again. But Liz knew it would be black.

Please watched. Tentative to tend to tend to tentatively. Intrigued as to how The scam worked.

Well, she watched the ball. It rattled. Around and as she had predicted, it landed in black, but only for a split second as she watched it shifted from black to an adjacent red. The Cupri, I said, red 21. But, As the guy collected, his winnings, Liz, watch to see.

If the cooper, A was Complacent with. The scam fraud. The QPA picked the ball up but not from red 21. But from black where is new. It had landed. It hadn't moved from the black. It had stayed there. Somehow, it was hidden. Liz got it. She heard she heard of the technique and a recent security conference.

This guy was using a holographic projector to hide the ball, and Project a hologram of the ball. In an adjacent position slot. But all slopped. Liz notified security to arrest, both the Cupria and the guy.

The bounce says Mafia types. In penguin, suits surrounded, the guy and hearded him off. The floor to a security office. At the same time, a new co-operate arrived with another security officer and the, accomplice It was arrested also. Heed befriended. Cupri.

Manipulated. Coerced her. Some Old story. Same old story thought this. A chair went up a signal for Liz. A signal. A chair winter. A signal to Liz, another punter. On a winning streak, another punter that may be. A corrupting the rules, she approached the table and waited. A guest.

Beard left and Liz took the seat and Placed her bet on black six. The winning punter looked at her for slightly too long. Yes, she thought, you know, it's a winner. That they both. Up one before the winning punter, could place his next, bet Liz placed hers.

The punter gesitated and nearly missed the opportunity to place the next bet on the same square. As Liz collected her winnings. She waited as the winning punter won again, and again.
Holographic Cheat - Unedited 1st Draft - End

ChatGPT - Rating: 3/5

What's Good About It:

Intriguing Concept:
The story has an engaging premise with Liz's superpower and the mysterious cheater at the roulette table, which draws readers into the narrative.

Suspenseful Atmosphere:
The setting of a casino and the element of cheating create a suspenseful atmosphere, making the reader curious about what will happen next.

Unique Character Abilities:
Liz's ability to predict outcomes adds a unique twist to the story, setting it apart from typical casino-themed tales.

Suggestions for Improvement:

Clarity and Structure:
The narrative can be confusing at times due to sentence structure and punctuation issues. Simplifying sentences and ensuring proper punctuation can greatly enhance readability.

Consistency in Terminology:
There are variations in the spelling of certain terms (e.g., "Cupri," "co-operate," "QPA"). Consistent terminology will help maintain immersion in the story.

Proofreading and Editing:
The text has several typos and grammatical errors (e.g., "punter's got up to," "Please watched"). A thorough proofreading would smooth out these distractions.

Character Development:
More background on Liz and her abilities would deepen the reader's understanding and connection to her character.

Streamlining the Narrative:
The story jumps between different actions and thoughts quickly. Focusing on a linear progression of events might make the narrative more coherent.

Overall, you've created an interesting scenario with a lot of potential. Refining the clarity and flow of the narrative will greatly enhance its impact. Keep up the creative work!

I hit the 10,000 character limit so I've put the rest of it in a follow-on section

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

Uncle Gizmo
Could you please run through it and correct spelling and punctuation errors

ChatGPT
Certainly! I'll correct the spelling and punctuation errors to enhance the clarity of your narrative. Here's the revised passage:

Holographic Cheat - Corrected spelling and punctuation - Start
Liz sat at the roulette table, discreetly watching the guy win again. He was calling black or red with unerring accuracy. An impossibility to be so accurate, well, unless you had Liz's superpower. She knew that guy was cheating, but she didn't know how. She knew of every device, every trick a punter could come up with, and here, she had ruled them all out.

Was he a precog? Like her. She was sure he wasn't. She could sense another precog; there was nothing from him. She concentrated. He bet on red; she could see it. She could see it would be black 17. The croupier said, "Final bets," and spun the wheel. She watched.

And the ball settled in black 17. As she had predicted, but then it was in a new place, red pocket, red 16. "Well," she thought, "that's not right. Then, I know, it was black 17." She watched carefully. He bet on red again, and she knew he was right. The ball landed in red, 20. He won again. And legitimately, he bet on red again. But Liz knew it would be black.

She watched tentatively, intrigued as to how the scam worked.

While she watched the ball, it rattled around, and as she had predicted, it landed in black, but only for a split second as she watched it shifted from black to an adjacent red. The croupier said, "Red 21." But, as the guy collected his winnings, Liz watched to see if the croupier was complicit in the scam. The croupier picked the ball up, but not from red 21, but from black, where she knew it had landed. It hadn't moved from the black. It had stayed there. Somehow, it was hidden. Liz got it. She had heard of the technique at a recent security conference.

This guy was using a holographic projector to hide the ball and project a hologram of the ball in an adjacent slot. Liz notified security to arrest both the croupier and the guy.

The bouncers, mafia types in penguin suits, surrounded the guy and herded him off the floor to a security office. At the same time, a new croupier arrived with another security officer, and the accomplice was arrested also. He had befriended and manipulated the croupier, coerced her. "Same old story," thought Liz.

A cheer went up, a signal to Liz, another punter on a winning streak, another punter that may be corrupting the rules. She approached the table and waited as a guest ran out of money.

Her beard left, and Liz took the seat and placed her bet on black six. The winning punter looked at her for slightly too long. "Yes," she thought, "you know it's a winner." Before the winning punter could place his next bet, Liz placed hers.

The punter hesitated and nearly missed the opportunity to place the next bet on the same square. As Liz collected her winnings, she waited as the winning punter won again and again.

Note: I made a few assumptions for unclear parts (e.g., "Her beard left" - this phrase was unclear, so I left it as is). Also, I retained the style and character names as you used them. Let me know if there are specific areas you'd like to focus on or if you need further revisions!
Holographic Cheat - Corrected spelling and punctuation - End

Uncle Gizmo
Now you have corrected the spelling and punctuation could you please grade it again

ChatGPT - Rating: 4/5

What's Improved:
Improved Clarity:
The corrections in spelling and punctuation have significantly enhanced the clarity and readability of the narrative. This makes the story flow more smoothly and allows the reader to focus on the plot and characters without distraction.

Consistency:
The consistent use of terms and corrected character names (e.g., "croupier" instead of "Cupri") has improved the narrative's consistency, making the casino setting more believable.

Remaining Strengths:
Engaging Concept: The story's premise, involving superpowers and a casino setting, remains intriguing and is now more effectively conveyed.

Suspense and Atmosphere:
The corrected text maintains the suspenseful atmosphere, drawing the reader into Liz's investigation of the cheating incident.

Suggestions for Further Improvement:

Narrative Flow:
While the clarity has improved, the narrative could benefit from smoother transitions between events and thoughts. This would help the story feel more cohesive.

Character Development:
Expanding on Liz's character, perhaps by providing more background on her abilities and motivations, would enhance the reader's connection to her.

Dialogue Tags and Descriptions:
Incorporating more dialogue tags and physical descriptions can provide additional context and emotional depth to the characters and their interactions.

Overall, the narrative has improved significantly with the corrections, making it more engaging and accessible. With a focus on deepening character development and refining the narrative flow, the story has great potential for captivating readers. Keep up the creative work!

Uncle Gizmo
Regarding “Dialogue Tags and Descriptions” - could you explain it and give me an example

ChatGPT
Certainly! In fiction writing, dialogue tags and physical descriptions play a crucial role in bringing scenes to life. They help readers visualize the setting and characters, understand the emotions behind the dialogue, and follow the story more easily.

Dialogue Tags:
These are the small phrases either before, after, or in the middle of dialogue, indicating who is speaking. They often include verbs like said, asked, whispered, etc. Effective use of dialogue tags can clarify who is speaking and convey their tone or mood.

Physical Descriptions:
These are details about the appearance, gestures, and actions of characters or the setting. They provide a visual picture, making the scene more vivid and immersive.

Example:

Original Text:
"The punter hesitated and nearly missed the opportunity to place the next bet on the same square. As Liz collected her winnings, she waited as the winning punter won again and again."

Enhanced with Dialogue Tags and Physical Descriptions:
"The punter hesitated, his hand trembling slightly over the betting table. 'Final bets,' the croupier announced, his voice echoing slightly in the tense air. The punter quickly threw his chips onto the same square, just as the croupier was about to close the bets. As Liz collected her winnings, her eyes narrowed observantly, she noticed a bead of sweat rolling down the punter's forehead. Despite his nervous demeanor, he won again and again, his smile growing more confident with each win."

Explanation:
In the enhanced example, dialogue tags ("the croupier announced") clarify who is speaking and set the scene's tempo. The physical descriptions ("hand trembling," "bead of sweat rolling down") provide a vivid picture of the punter's nervousness and the high-stakes atmosphere of the casino. This not only helps the reader visualize the scene but also deepens the emotional impact, making the characters and their experiences more relatable and engaging.

 

[conception_native_0123]

are you the one that started that thread called "I'm in love with chatGPT"? If so, I can obviously tell. No I'm not reading all that!