What's your best/worst joke?

[CJ_London]

You missed a couple

request to clarify what type of light bulb

ask when the wiring was last checked

 

[conception_native_0123]

That's the longest joke I've ever seen yama.

 

[Dick7Access]

Thanks, your post lit me up!

 

[Cronk]

The trainee aircraft pilot had as his final test the object of flying a tin a paint to a destination following a complicated route. I can report that the trainee passed with flying colors.

 

[AccessBlaster]

 

[NauticalGent]

Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships...


So when they arrive back in port, they can Scandinavian

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

The lightbulb joke reminding me of this little sketching joke....

Gate to Light Bulb to Kn.......​

Google Slide HERE:-

Gate

Gate to Light Bulb to Kn....... 2022_07_30 Tony Hine - Nifty Access

docs.google.com

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

 

[The_Doc_Man]

Uncle G., I've seen videos like that one before, and it frightens me to think that lawyers exist who are so abysmally stupid. They pride themselves over their "logic" and promptly proceed to demonstrate that their problem is much deeper. I wonder how they even make a living. But then I recall that these chowderheads DO get hired, which means their clients are even dumber. And some of the witness answers weren't uttered by the sharpest tacks in the drawer either.

This is supposed to be funny, but at the same time... Wow, what a depressing thought.

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

A friend of a friend, a stenographer, I think that's the right term, in a court, recording proceedings into text.

The stenographer told my friend about a particular case where a man had been caught having sex with a duck.

The witness was asked, Mr Smith, when you rounded the corner and saw Mr Jones in a compromising position, what did you say to him? The witness said, I said:- "good morning Mr Jones"!

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

A friend of a friend, a stenographer, I think that's the right term, in a court, recording proceedings into text.

The stenographer told my friend about a particular case where a man had been caught having sex with a duck.

The witness was asked, Mr Smith, when you rounded the corner and saw the defendant in a compromising position, what did you say? I said "good morning Mr Jones"!

---

---

 

[CJ_London]

 

[The_Doc_Man]

View attachment 102336

The odds are that the second part of the interview will be easier to arrange. Some of the news readers on flaming liberal stations would almost certainly qualify and would be readily available.

 

[NauticalGent]

 

[KitaYama]

Moral lesson : Never play near home.

 

[NauticalGent]

 

[NauticalGent]

 

[moke123]

 

[CJ_London]

 

[CJ_London]

A young Mexican maid asked for a pay increase.


The wife among the couple she worked for was very upset about this and
decided to talk to her about the raise. She asked: 'Now Maria, why do you
want a pay increase?'

Maria: 'Well, Senora, there are three reasons why I want an increase.
The first is that I iron better than you.'

Wife: 'Who said you iron better than me?'

Maria: 'Your husband said so.'

Wife: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.'

Wife: 'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?'

Maria: 'Your husband did.'

Wife: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'

Wife: (really furious now) 'Did my husband say that as well?'

Maria: 'No Senora...the gardener did.'

Wife: 'So how much do you want?'