What's your best/worst joke?

[CJ_London]

 

[NauticalGent]

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Twenty-Oneth or Twenty-Wonth. Its a great response to a deadline:
The boss: "When will I have my report?!?"
You: "On the Twenty-Oneth of this month..."

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

I kept saying 25th

 

[oleronesoftwares]

Why do Cows wear bells? Because their horns do not work.

 

[CJ_London]

 

[The_Doc_Man]

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But that's EASY to pronouce.... say twenty-first with a heavy lisp.

 

[KitaYama]

 

[oleronesoftwares]

@CJ_London ,some of us are under age in thinking on this platform.

 

[oleronesoftwares]

it is 21th street

 

[Cotswold]

Over the years I've taken my wife to loads of places, hundreds in fact...............but she always finds her way home.

 

[oleronesoftwares]

I was in my car driving back from work. A police officer pulled me over and knocked on my window. I said, ‘One minute I’m on the phone

 

[NauticalGent]

A teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question: ‘Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?
‘Michael said: ‘Just a minute I have to go pee.’
The teacher responded by saying: ‘That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?’
Sherman said: ‘I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.’
Teacher : ‘That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?’
Johnny said ‘I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.’
The teacher fainted…

 

[The_Doc_Man]

Well, he HAD to be tactful - he didn't want her to think he was going to give her a hard time.

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

Why does this describe my sister perfectly #shorts

youtube.com

 

[NauticalGent]

If you step on a purple mushroom, you’ll be forced to marry the ugliest person in the world,” warned the old gnome, so the man continued carefully through the woods. He didn’t step on any purple mushrooms.

Suddenly a beautiful woman walked up and said: “We have to marry.”
“Why?” asked the man, smiling.
“I just stepped on one of those f*****g purple mushrooms!” she replied.

 

[NauticalGent]

Can't believe the amount of people that don't understand erectile dysfunction!

I mean, it's not that hard......

 

[The_Doc_Man]

I thought about your ED comment, Gent, and wondered if I should say something about it. But on this subject, I just can't make a stand.

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

I would rather be scorned for having ED than admit to the real cause of the problem....

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

Job just opened up at Walmart:-

ANGRY WALMART WORKER

youtube.com

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

Blonde Joke

A blind man walks into a bar & attempts to tell a blonde joke #lol #joke

youtube.com