Questions from women that put a shudder down mens spines

[RichMorrison]

How about:

"Honey, would you like to.................. for our anniversary"?

I need a good answer for this one ASAP.

Thanks,
RichM

 

[Idjit]

Rich:

"That sounds brilliant! I'll make the arrangements."

 

[Idjit]

Idjit is starting it again...

Oh, no you don't - ya can't pin this one on me, see? I din't do nuthin', see?

 

[ThunderHeart]

1."We have to talk ..." Usually said at a time when you can't talk, so you spend the rest of the day wondering. And it’s never, ever good!

2.After listening to you talk in your sleep, she wakes you up and asks "who is ... (fill in the blank)?"

 

[Rich]

Marry me?

 

[Lister]

How the hell did we resurrect this thread?

For God’s sake I got married in the time that I first posted on this thread!

I still say Ha – hu and watch the sport though.

By the way, my wife is pregnant and I will keep you up to date with the sorry details.

Sex
Name
Birth Date
How I’m doing
How she’s doing
How my psychologically damaged dog Rose is going
Etc

 

[Spoony]

"Have u ever thought of using Viagra?"

 

[Mile-O]

By the way, my wife is pregnant and I will keep you up to date with the sorry details.

Sex
Name
Birth Date
How I’m doing
How she’s doing
How my psychologically damaged dog Rose is going
Etc

Father?

 

[Rich]

How my psychologically damaged dog Rose is going
Etc

Have you taken her to the dog quack?

 

[Groundrush]

I've hoovered under the bed and found some interesting magazines...

 

[skea]

What are you looking at! Then a slap in the face follows.

 

[skea]

How about us Men.

A man has a little more trouble letting go. Six months after the breakup at 3 am early on a Sunday morning - he will call and say "I just wanted to let you know you ruined my life, and I'll never forgive you, and I hate you, and you're a total floozy. But I want you to know there's always a chance for us." This is known as the "I Hate You/I Love You" drunken phone call, that 99% of all men have made at least once.

 

[nikkypickles]

On another note, the singer of a popular band here in the U.S. named Creed recently took his ex-wife to court for domestic assault. She beat him pretty badly, but he didn't touch her at all. I was listening to the radio when I heard about this and the DJ said that he was a p*ssy letting himself be beat like that. Many callers called in agreeing with the DJ saying he was a pathetic, one listener actually said he wasn't a man. Now come on people! I think he was more of a man for NOT hitting her. How can they be so hypocritical? These are the same people that would be throwing rocks at a man who defended himself against his wife and broke her arm while she was trying to beat him with a baseball bat. In conclusion, I think society doesn't look as strongly at domestic assault on men as they do on women. In fact, they are more likely to shrug off or have opposite feelings on them.

Part of this may be down to the fact that a man is (generally) stronger than a woman. What may take enormous physical effort on her part to beat her husband, may be replicated without breaking a sweat for him.

Similar scenario - a martial arts instructor was being beaten up by a group of thugs, getting hurt quite badly. Punched one thug in the face, a single time - killing him instantly. Judge sentenced him to life: it was an unfair fight.

 

[KenHigg]

.
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.
.

Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on
what could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now
that my wife has been cheating on me.

The usual signs... Phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs
up.

My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I
ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you
don't know them."

I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she
always walks down the drive, although I can hear a car setting off,
as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe
she wasn't in a taxi? I once picked her cell phone up just to see what
time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never
touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her.

Anyway, I have never broached the subject with my wife. I think
deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out
again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my Harley Davidson Heritage next to
the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole
street when she comes home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my Harley, that I noticed that the rocker boxes on my engine seem to be
leaking a little oil.

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the dealer?

Thanks,
Bob

 

[Bodisathva]

Nice to see your new-found power didn't go to your head... spoken like a true H.O.G.

 

[Rich]

.
.
.
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Strange how you can get some things into perspective, there may be hope for you yet

 

[FoFa]

Phone rings at work.
Husband picks it up.
Wife in rushed voice: How do you turn off the main water?

 

[KenHigg]

Nice to see your new-found power didn't go to your head... spoken like a true H.O.G.

It had me going all the way down to the last line -