On a more positive note...

[dan-cat]

you will note that I didn't start the fussin in the first place

That's not fair Mr Higg. He hit me first.

 

[ColinEssex]

Would you describe him as a buddy or a chum?

Most British people don't use the American word "buddy"and "chum" is rather old fashioned.

As I said - Rich is a mate.

I'm curious as to why you should ask such an odd question

Col

 

[Rich]

Most British people don't use the American word "buddy"and "chum" is rather old fashioned.

As I said - Rich is a mate.

I'm curious as to why you should ask such an odd question

Col

They still think we call each other old chap

 

[ColinEssex]

Most British people don't use the American word "buddy"and "chum" is rather old fashioned.

As I said - Rich is a mate.

I'm curious as to why you should ask such an odd question

Col

Actually it could be an American attempt at subtle humour. . . . . . . . Buddy Rich? the drummer and band leader. Its a bit deep though

Col

 

[dan-cat]

Actually it could be an American attempt at subtle humour. . . . . . . . Buddy Rich? the drummer and band leader. Its a bit deep though

Col

A bit deep for American humor or a bit deep for me?

 

[dan-cat]

I'm curious as to why you should ask such an odd question

It was a failed attempt to lighten the mood. I didn't mean to cause any offense. Sorry if I did.

 

[Ron_dK]

As I said - Rich is a mate.
Col

Why do these guys remind me of Statler and Waldorf ?

 

[Rich]

Why do these guys remind me of Statler & Waldorf

Can you repeat that ?

 

[Rich]

It was a failed attempt to lighten the mood.

But Danielle, Col and I are always in a light hearted mood

 

[dan-cat]

But Danielle, Col and I are always in a light hearted mood

I always thought you made such a happy couple.

 

[ColinEssex]

It was a failed attempt to lighten the mood. I didn't mean to cause any offense. Sorry if I did.

No offence taken - after I thought of the Buddy Rich thing, I thought it was rather clever

Col

 

[dan-cat]

No offence taken - after I thought of the Buddy Rich thing, I thought it was rather clever

Col

So did I. It was a couple more thought processes than what I intended.

 

[Rich]

So did I. It was a couple more thought processes than what I intended.

but then we're always a couple of steps ahead of you

 

[dan-cat]

but then we're always a couple of steps ahead of you

Ker ching!

 

[ColinEssex]

So did I. It was a couple more thought processes than what I intended.

I did wonder

Col

 

[KenHigg]

How Many Church Members Does it Take to Change A Light Bulb?

Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.

Pentecostals: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.

Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

[KenHigg]

The Price of Children

The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition.

But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down.

It translates into:

* $8,896.66 a year,

* $741.38 a month, or

* $171.08 a week.

* That's a mere $24.24 a day!

* Just over a dollar an hour.

What do you get for your $160,140?

* Naming rights. First, middle, and last!

* Glimpses of God every day.

* Giggles under the covers every night.

* More love than your heart can hold.

* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.

* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.

* A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.

* A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites

* Some one to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:


* finger-paint,

* carve pumpkins,

* play hide-and-seek,

* catch lightning bugs, and

* never stop believing in Santa Claus.

You have an excuse to:

* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,

* watching Saturday morning cartoons,

* going to Disney movies, and

* wishing on stars.

* You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:

* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,

* taking the training wheels off a bike,

* removing a splinter,

* filling a wading pool,

* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat to history to witness the:

* first step,

* first word,

* first bra,

* first date, and

* first time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal.

You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren.

You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God.

You have all the power t o heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits,

So . . one day they will like you, love without counting the cost.
That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!

And, you get to do it all over again with your grandchildren.

If you take care of yourself, you might even get to stick a "great" in there too!

Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren!!!

 

[Rich]

* Glimpses of God every day.

and of the Devil, oddly enough

 

[selenau837]

That is the sweetest thing Ken.

You can be a real sweet heart when you want to be.

 

[Rich]

Well I have to ask, how many fathers actually get to see their daughters in their first bra, sounds highly suspect to me?